I prefer to donate time. I’m now president of one local non-profit (in addition to my paying job), and a regular participant in another. Sometimes I’ll donate supplies that we need, but never money.

If a time comes when I have little time and a lot of money, maybe I’ll switch. Donors are necessary. But I know that we need hands more than dollars.

I had one interesting experience when it came to explicit consent. I walked to the date, she drove. No alcohol was consumed by any parties.

She offered to give me a ride home, which I politely declined, and then accepted when she pushed. I asked her if she wanted to come inside, and she said yes. I asked her if she wanted to come upstairs, and she said yes. We went up to my bedroom, did the deed, I asked her if she wanted to take a shower together and she said yes. I asked her if she wanted to go for round 2 and she said no. She left, shortly thereafter, and I was pretty confused when she told me she had felt pressured into sex and didn’t want to see me again, when I thought I had intentionally given her lots of opportunities to say yes or no.

I still don’t think I need to get a legally binding document agreeing to engagement in sexual intercourse, but that experience really demonstrated to me that an extra awkward question or two is better than the alternative.