More or less damage than he’s currently doing?

My recent benefits enrollment meeting talked about being able to do an annual physical through a virtual visit. Being a man of a certain age, “self rectal exam” was the first thing I thought about.

Great! Now that you’ve said that, republicans are going to try to outlaw transistors. Or, at the very least, round them up and try to “fix” them into basic resistors.

“I wanna drink some milk, but it’s so flimmin-flammin hard to open.”

Yeah, that’s kinda the whole point of religion.

Nature vs. Nurture says that at least part of the blame is hers.

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Given what we know about the church, this very well could have been a case of being drugged and coercion.

She was in lockstep with the democratic party, whereas Bernie would have been a gremlin in the machine.

Because, if he were, he would have stepped up and been a father. That’s how Bernie rolls.

Yes, they will.

Not weird. Criminal. The word you’re looking for is criminal.

Is there’s something wrong with eating before sunset and saving money?

It’s so thoughtful of them to disconnect from the government so fully and then send out letters ensuring they are put on every watch list we have.

Current AI is a glorified predictive text keyboard.

Dude, you can get Miralax on same-day Prime… Even in New Zealand!

Israel is using the American police defense of “I was scared so I had to kill them”.

It’s probably because of that one time Nixon had Cosby over for a sleepover.

We’ll… it wasn’t planned as a sleepover…

Chopsticks!

Woo Ha!