I don’t think that at all. I think you’re struggling and this is a cry for help. I’m just trying to give you a stick. (Like https://boggletheowl.tumblr.com/post/41509206591/ive-been-getting-a-lot-of-these-lately-and-i )
Unfortunately no one outside yourself will be able to save you on this one. You have to decide to make effort to improve. Especially if you’re not in the financial position to get professional help. Good luck and I wish you the best.
Your options are to continue to be miserable or work on yourself. You don’t seem to want to do the work, but you do a good job pulling down excuses.
I’ve mentioned plenty of ways to get around being broke. But you don’t want help. You want to complain. Hopefully some day you’ll get past that. I wish you luck with your health issues.
Changing yourself is not erasing yourself. It’s improving yourself. ‘Old and weird’? Nah, I got lots of old weirdos that are an absolute delight in my life.
Okay, you’re not a bad person. How is someone supposed to know that? What do you do? Tell me about yourself, but don’t say stuff about what you are. Tell me what you do. 3 things.
Chances are the more you do, the more you’ll find yourself around people that will find what you do desirable.
“being unlucky” - aren’t we all, at least sometimes? “Unable to be social” - believe it or not, this is a learnable skill! Google or YouTube ‘how to make friendly conversation’ “Having no one around” - are you living alone in a forest where you must hunt/gather all your food? Even if that is the case, you clearly have the Internet! “Being a failed adult” - again, all adult skills are learned skills. That’s why babies are so bad at adulting. “No job or money” - those are things you can get! The more skills you have, the easier it will be! “To offer any woman” - If your goal is a GF, get skills that make you a desirable partner.
Plenty of good qualities don’t cost a dime.
Edit: and you are totally capable. It’s just going to take effort, which, judging from your replies, you don’t want to put in. Can’t help with that part.
I’ll say it again. Kill the part of yourself that resists change or it will kill you.
I have AuADHD. Executive dysfunction so bad I will look at clothes next to the laundry basket and say “those go in the basket” and then walk away. Then do it again 10 more times in the next half hour. I get it. I’m not saying it’s easy. It’s very much not. But you gotta walk away from your learned helplessness or nothing will ever change.
My point before was that small steps are still steps. Most skills are learned in tiny increments. You won’t be able to look back and see progress for a bit. That doesn’t mean there’s no progress. If your goal is to feel bad for yourself you’re succeeding. But if it’s to become a functioning adult then you gotta start somewhere sometime. Yesterday was the best time to start but today is the second best.
I responded elsewhere as well, but I want to say this here too: you clearly have some issues, and it can be really hard to deal with that when you’re not in a good mental or financial place, but I encourage you to find a way.
Pick something. Anything at all, that you are interested in learning or doing and google it. Learn a skill. You’re worth the time it takes. Start working towards a way to be a success on something. Anything. Learn to be a good cook. Learn to code. Learn to juggle (admittedly less helpful in the real world, but at least interesting). It doesn’t matter what but start working some kind of improvement. When I was a baby, I couldn’t do anything for myself, but turns out if you do something enough times you learn anyway.
This isn’t about the sex thing. It’s about you feeling stuck and unable to move forward. It’s about you feeling like a failure and being mad at yourself for feeling that way. Your brain will resist change. Kill the part of you that refuses change before it kills you.
You don’t have to sit stagnant even if it feels helpless. I promise that by doing something, anything, you’ll start to feel a tiny bit better week over week. And some day, you’ll look back on this question and know the answer (assuming that’s a goal of yours).
Then go get some qualities that are worth shit in the real world.
While this is indeed a list, it pales in comparison to what you can do in or near a large city.
I enjoy a ton of things on your list but there’s stuff you just can’t easily do outside of a metro area. Especially stuff you need a specialized teacher for.
If the job requires you to be at your desk then presumably that means you have work to complete. Judge people for what they get done, not how often they mindlessly move a mouse and this wouldn’t be a problem!
This is ridiculous! We will never have a teenage president because you have to be 35 to run. Proof the whole thing is rigged.
Attacked for being the “wrong kind of straight couple”? I’m not saying it doesn’t happen but I don’t know that I’ve seen any actual attacks for that. Plenty of people preaching that women should stay home in the kitchen or whatever, but on average, social media alone has tipped that scale, I think.
You seem to be under the impression that straight couples in media are only ever married with 2.5 kids with a working father and stay at home mom but that really doesn’t seem like it’s been the case for a while.
While polyamory is probably still underrepresented, I’m not sure about your other examples. Also polyamory often includes at least one LGBTQ+ relationship so I’m not sure it makes your point. And a trans person in a heterosexual relationship falls at least half into LGBTQ+ by definition.
Most rom coms aren’t about married couples with kids. Most sit coms show relationships where both partners work. The old trope of the dad who knows nothing about his kids is pretty dead at this point. Divorced and widowed couples show up a lot, too.
I don’t think you’re wrong that all kinds of relationships and gender expressions should be represented, but comparing it to the overall lack of LGBTQ+ rep out there… Well, one of these things is not like the other.
Also, my sister works and her husband is a stay at home dad. When people hear this they say “oh” and move on. When I mention my nephew is trans… Well the reaction is different. Very different. As stupid as it sounds, media representation plays a huge role in exposing people to things they don’t get the chance to see often in their own lives (especially if you’re from a small town). It’s good for people to see trans characters they like and relate to before they find out about my nephew. I actually use it as a gauge to decide if I should tell people at all.
So long as straight is the assumption (or default), we are gonna need these kinds of spaces.
In a similar vein, I was trying to find something on Facebook (yeah, I know, but it was a funny work thing) today and went to use the search function to look for the FB page in question (searched the exact name) and if you just hit enter the new AI assumes you’re asking it a question. It’s FB! It’s not a search engine! Why is it trying to give me a phone number for the police department I’m looking up to see their insane post?! I want to see the page! The page with the name I searched! On the app I searched in! Now you have to click a separate button that specifies you’re looking to search through FB… In the FB app!
This AI crap is already k.i.l.l.i.n.g. me.
I mean, the containers are steel filled with concrete. We also leave our bridges and buildings outside, exposed to the elements.
The place in the world you are most likely to know the exact amount of radiation you are receiving at any moment is probably at a nuclear power plant. Its not like they just abandon them and never check on them or anything. They sit out in the open just… chillin. Being generally monitored but mostly just… chillin.
WIPP is for low level transuranic waste from DOE projects, just FYI. Not super toxic stuff. They ship it in these super tough containers that they test by dropping on a spike and putting in a furnace. Wild to watch.
Difficult considering social security isn’t a tax. Without looking it up my guess is that number rolls up the 14-15% of SS and Medicare taxes so the real number is lower.
For some of them, they are. There’s a whole thing in the Bible about how bad the world has to get (including a war in Israel) for the second coming to happen, and they’re trying to force it.
A ton of evangelicals believe they are living in the end times and there’s no reason to care about the future of the planet or nation anyway.
By their own fault? Do they just super enjoy living outside?
I’m from the rural South and there are plenty of ostentatious displays of wealth. Particularly surrounding how your home looks - decorating for every single holiday for no reason comes to mind.
Plenty of rural Americans are super poor. It generally takes more money to live in the city so that should make some sense. I grew up rural poor - my family were partially subsistence farmers, cutting our grocery bill.
To answer the question from OP - I’m not sure I count as properly middle class but I’m definitely more stable than I was growing up, so I’ll say my biggest changes are being more conscious of what I look and smell like. When you’re poor, everything smells like whatever’s on sale. I have kept my tendency to overbuy during sales for anything is shelf stable for long periods of time even if I already have plenty.